TRANSITION

as some of you may know, i lost my job a little over a month ago. as you can imagine it was a rather harsh blow for me. the shock, the worry, the uncertain future in these troubled economic times and lastly, the reality of my situation. to be completely honest, i was hurt by what transpired at my former job, having been released about one month short of my 6th year with this company, i'm fired. oh, believe me, if my objective is to be open and honest with my readers, i can't change direction now and try to minimize or "candy coat" this. i wouldn't only not be honest, but not truthful by trying to convey it as if i was "laid off" when in fact i wasn't. i do regret making decisions that day that i was released, but early on, i knew what's done is done. yeah, i didn't like such a drastic decision, although this was my livelihood, it's not the end of life. just the end of this particular chapter in my life.

with an unemployment claim denied, no concrete job lined up, the search continues. however in the midst of this TRANSITION i am at peace. as i've told several friends, i have NO OTHER CHOICE but to remain positive, hopefully and focused. yeah, the "sting" of losing my job shook me a little, but i picked up myself, ironically, three days later. i know that for whatever reason God has allowed for this to happen, it's in my best interest. yeah, i don't know what awaits me in the near future, but if i stay true to my faith and walk in the Lord, not only will He guide me, but if need be carry me. i refuse to fall into the trap of despair, hurt, anger, bitterness, hopelessness, fear and so on. the way that i see this is, what good would all that do for me??? what good is worry?? what good is hurt or bitterness?? what good is fear?? how do those thoughts and emotions help lift me up, encourage me, or guide me through this season. i cannot and will not pass myself as the "poor little victim", in all honesty, that's just pretty dumb. if this season is to test my faith, than so be it, but by the same token i have to be proactive in what i do to find a job.

in this midst of this uncertainty i now find myself in, i'm thankful God Himself has blessed me with a close circle of trusted friends . . . . brothers, if you will, who surround me and i know, pray for me. one of which helped me to come on board at a charter school to help substitute while i continue my search of permanent employment. these friend, these brothers God allowed for them to come my way by His divine plan. I recall telling one of these brothers that i don't know how some people not only blame God, but hold it against Him when life changes (crisis) come their way. in all honesty??? i don't understand how a person who doesn't have a relationship with Christ, get through some of the mess life hands us, that whole concept is beyond me.

i leave you with this, this morning i didn't set out to post a new blog entry. i was simply on-line doing some job searches and HE prompted me to share this. if you find yourself in a crisis, whether it's a job situation, health, finances, family, a lost job or home, endless amounts of debt, know and i mean know it in your spirit, don't just understand it, know it, that whatever season you find yourself in, it is working for your good. i know, (i really do) it may not seem like it when we're in the middle of a future of uncertainty and we have all these unanswered questions, but HE IS THERE! you may not "feel" HIM, but HE is. in the middle of endless job searches, HE IS THERE, in the midst of family crisis, HE IS THERE, frustrated with a job, HE IS THERE, in the midst of heartache and broken promises, HE IS THERE, don't know how you're going to make ends meet? HE IS THERE, whatever you face, not only trust HIM, but trust IN HIM.

my prayer for you who read this, is that the peace of GOD ALMIGHTY surround you, may HE lift you up, and take you places that in your mind were not possible, because i simply trust HIM to do it for me as well. blessings!

strength and honor,

[dM]

FYI

dear friends, i just wanted you to know that there is more for me to share on my blogsite here in the near future. due to an unexpected change that has occured, i'm not afforded too much free time in order to post my personal experiences to help and encourage you on a regular basis. my heart is to be as open and honest with my readers to allow you to see the many things that occur not only in my life, but in your's as well. i've been dealt a harsh blow nearly two week ago, however i hold on to my faith in HIM Who has allow these thing to occur. we are all on this journey together and i hope and trust that in some small measure, i am able to encourage and inspire you as YOU travel on this journey called life.

as i enter in a new season in my life, and when all this dust has settled, i will be more than happy to share with you, what has transpired within these last few weeks. until next time friends . . . . .

strength and honor,

[dM]

thursday's quote

"all God's giants have been weak men, who did great things for God because they reckoned on HIs being with them" ---hudson taylor

tuesday's quote

"we sow a thought and reap an act, we sow an act and reap a habit, we sow a habit and reap a character, we sow a character and reap a destiny" ---william makepeace thackeray

monday's quote

"the utterly best thing for a man is to be good, even if he were never rewarded for it" ---charles kingsley

oh no!, not me (part 5)

looking back on that whole episode that i experience with this ministry and it's leadership, was the fact that i was offend because i was lied to, deceived, and betrayed by so called men of God. the truth of the matter is that my expectations of them, as ministers and leaders was shattered. the new testament speaks of the phileo love that we share and/or give as Christians. it's an affectionate love that is conditional. phileo says, "you scratch my back, and i'll scratch yours," or "you treat me kindly, and i'll do the same." i've learned the hard way, that i've got to love others in spite of what i they can do for me in return.

for example, several years ago, my best friend was without a car, although at one time he had two, one was an older car which needed engine repairs and in light of how old the car was, it was better to just leave as is and not bother trying to repair it. it would have been more costly to repair than what the car was worth. the other ended up in an accident and, well, pretty much the same situation there. i offered my car to my buddy on several occasions and at one point, he had it for about a month or so, if not longer. when i finally got my car back from him, there were times that i knew it would once again come in handy for him. aside from that, when he was also in need of finances i would offer to help him with that as well. what i'm about to share is an example as to how twisted and damaged i was. to some it may sound a bit trivial, but if my sharing this helps someone, somehow, it's severed it's intended purpose.

if my best friend, choose not to accept either my car to help him get to work and for personal errands or he choose not to accept money to help him, i was hurt by that. i was offended, i felt rejected. the way the devil had me was basically like this: if my friend didn't need my car, he didn't need david. if he didn't need my financial help, he didn't need me. this goes back to the one of the major categories that i stated in my previous entry. i was part of the "those who believe they have been treated unjustly. i didn't see that way, i didn't see it as what it simply was. if he didn't need my car, he simply didn't need it. but since i never dealt with my wounded spirit, i saw it as, if he doesn't need my help, he doesn't need me. i know it may sound a bit extreme, but please, understand, that was the trap i once found myself in. i've come to the conclusion, just as john bevere stated in his book, "if i have expectations about certain persons, those people can let me down. they will disappoint me to the degree that they fall short of my expectations. but if i have no expectations about someone, anything given is a blessing and not something owed"

unknowingly, we set ourselves up for offence when we require certain behaviors from those with whom we have relationships. the more we expect, the greater the potential offense. we construct walls when we are hurt to safeguard our hearts and prevent any future wounds. we become selective, denying entry to all we fear will hurt us. we filter out anyone we think owes us something and open our lives only to those we believe are on our side. if we don't risk being hurt, we cannot give unconditional love. unconditional love give others the right to hurt us.

in closing, i simply ask you this, what is it that you expect from others? and what do you think others expect from you?

excerpts from the bait of statan by john bevere charisma house 2004

friday's quote

"it is more important to help a stumbling brother that to prove yourself correct" ---john bevere